Many of the times when I have felt most alive have been when the odds are against me or when I could (maybe should) have been in danger for some reason. The thing about being a man in today's world is that so much of society wants us to not be what we are. Society tells us that all that we are is wrong, so much of what comes natural to us is seen by the current social order to be destructive and uncivilized. Men live in world where we walk the fine line between being creators and destroyers.
So begins a topic that I hope to explore at different points throughout the year. It should be an interesting ride.
I grew up mostly in and around Northampton, basically feminist central. It's cool to see women growing into a more empowered definition of what it is to be a woman. Particularly adding in the "powerful" adjective. And it seems to me that (in progressive areas anyway) this has been largely successful in changing the general public's idea of what "woman" means.
ReplyDeleteBut then I think, what about the masculenist (masculist?) revolution? Perhaps this one is a little late it coming because our old stereotype wasn't as dis-empowering as the female one, but we need an upgrade all the same.
Most men grow up being harassed pretty severely for anything they do/say/wear that isn't near the macho/heterosexual extreme. What's the message there, something like "be strong, don't show fear, be the bread winner."
A lot of men are reconsidering. I assume that most of them are discovering that it's not so much the being strong or winning or that kind of stuff that really matters, but rather to what extent they've figured out what really matters to them, what they really want to do, and are doing it.
Here's a page by a man who's done a ridiculous amount of personal growth work:
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2008/05/how-to-be-a-man/
A little of his stuff isn't fully tested, for example he's still midway through experimenting with dropping monogamy, I'm curious how that resolves over the next few years. But for the most part he's experimented vigorously and is talking from experience about what works. I've spent many hours reading his articles, and they make me laugh and/or tear up regularly. Definitely an energy boost.
- Jason
As always, great food for thought. I think the new masculine has to allow us to be both. A guy like me is on one end of the extreme and I am perfectly accepting and supportive of men on the other end of the extreme. The problem I have is that society wants the masculine to be both extremes and accepts and supports neither. I believe that as men we are vilified long before we ever get to decide who we are. I think the modern man should be allowed to be the scotch swilling, hard charging, jock or the caring, nurturing, intellectual or here's a radical idea... anywhere in between that he wants to be. But if society and pop culture is correct (and we know how often it is) we get to be Homer Simpson most of time.
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